The frustrated mom and the "patience" Darren...

updated by mommy @ 5 years 3 months 3 weeks and 1 day old

After Darren finished doing his homework just now, I continued doing some Right Brain training worksheets with him. Initially we were having some fun doing some creativity thinking but after some exercises, he started to lose his concentration.

He started not sitting properly and I warned him to sit properly. He again repeated the "lazy posture" and I threathened him that his bones will get all crooked if he continue to sit like that. He then sit properly.

We were doing one of the lessons that need some matching work to be done. It was a mix and match activities and guess what the final picture will turn out. He could not understand the concept and keep guessing the answer wrong. I was not happy and kept explaining to him how it was done. Sometimes he get it, most of the time he couldn't. I tried all ways to explain to him and tried to control my "cool". After so many rounds of explaination and yet he couldn't get it, I was about to "burst".

I started to tell him to concentrate. I don't think he is so stupid that he cannot understand. I believe he is just not concentrating. Then, I followed by more threats like

"Next time when you enter the big school, if you are not concentrating, the teacher will punish you, will beat you, will make you stay in the school until you finish your work.."

He tried...I can see he is trying but he is not trying hard. While I was explaining and asking him questions, he answered me in such a soft voice. He tried to answer and never show any irritation though he could not get the answer.

I asked him, "Do you understand what mommy is telling you?" He answered me,

"Yes..concentrate.."

Arrgthh...pengsan... I didn't mean that. I was trying to ask whether he understands my explanation. So I told him to stop and no need to do because I can see that he is tired already. But he was so "afraid". He plead me to let him continue and he said he still want to do. He was scared of me, I can see.

Anyway, before I lose my cool, I asked hubby to come and explain to him. He still could not get the concept right. Finally, we decided to ask him to stop and take a rest.

After I regain my cool, I realise how "patience" my son was while I felt so frustrated with him. He never reacted negatively or rebel while I kept "forcing" him to understand. He even talked to me softly, though I was pressing him hard.

He then even help me to bring my bag upstairs, help me find my handphone and bring upstairs and when he saw me using my "almost finished" moisturiser, he told me he can give me money and asked me to buy a new one.

I felt so touched...and I felt guilty of being so harsh/frustrated with him just now. I'm sure he was just tired coz he has been on the table doing his work for about an hour already. Moreover, he was wearing his eye patch. He might have felt very tired or his eyes were straining to find the "right picture" by then.

Luckily I did not "scold" or "burst" that time. Though I was frustrated, I tried to control myself too. It wasn't such a bad scene but I must remind myself to be more patience and understanding with him the next time.

Darren, you were behaving extremely well just now though mommy sounded so frustrated with you. I am proud that you managed to control your emotion so well and remain cool and patience with mommy. Mommy loves you!!